What you are listening to is a funny commercial I did for an audio production course I took. I was somewhat limited with what I could do - mainly because it had to be exactly 60 seconds. I could have easily made it twice that long - in fact the first take was 1:42. I also had to use lots of sound effects (SFX) and the whole thing had to be over a music bed. I did all the voices and created all but one of the sound effects - in fact I spent one night drinking beer and farting into the computer to get the flatulence sounds - it was hard work. All things considered I thought it came out pretty good - I even received an 'A' on it.

(SFX: Phone Ringing)
(Music Bed: Grieg's "Morning from 'Peer Gynt'")
Wife: Hello, ooh, OK. See you at seven (SFX: Phone Hanging Up).
Dear - the Robinsons just invited us over for dinner, and free sex again.
Husband: I don't like Mrs. Robinson, she looks and smells like a sasquatch,
I think she might be a bigfoot.
Wife: Well, we don't want to be impolite.
Husband & Wife: What can we do?

(Music Bed: Prokofiev's "Montagues and Capulets")
Announcer: Here's what they can do:
Research has shown that a well timed fart will do wonders in extricating people from unwanted social situations.
But our unfortunate couple do not have a propensity for excessive flatulence.
The solution: Super-Bean-A-Mite.
Super-Bean-A-Mite - guaranteed for immediate crepitation results.
Let's see how things worked out for our lucky couple after just one dose of Super-Bean-A-Mite.

(Music Bed: Wagner's "Ride of the Valkyries")
(SFX Bed: Dishes & Silverware)
Man: Could you pass the cabbage (SFX: Flatus), please.
Wife: Could you pass the brocolli (SFX: Excessively Moist Flatus*), please?
Oh - could someone get me a napkin.
Mr. Robinson: Aah maybe we should skip the group sex tonight - and don't call us, we'll call you!

(Music Bed: Tchaikovsky's "1812 Overture")
Announcer: Well, it appears our couple is no longer welcome at the Robinsons.
Husband & Wife: Thank you Super-Bean-A-Mite!
Announcer: Super-Bean-A-Mite, available in fine stores everywhere.

All voices and sound effects by Mike Schuster except:
* from "Are You Embarrassed Easily?", Monty Python CD "The Final Rip Off"